Appreciated Aspects Often Overlooked by Those Who Relied Less on Self-Reliance During Upbringing: Personal Resilience, Independence, and Self-Determination
In a world where seeking help is often seen as a sign of strength, there exists a group of individuals who find it challenging to do so - the hyper-independent. Trauma therapist Sarah Herstich explains that this group of people, characterized by their self-reliance, struggle with asking for help due to their childhood experiences.
Hyper-independent individuals highly value taking initiative without being asked. Their hard work, a trait honed from growing up having to do everything themselves, is highly appreciated. However, this self-reliance often extends to their personal and professional lives, leading them to overcommit to work or personal projects, a burden they often bear alone.
The fear of others letting them down or betraying their trust is a constant concern for hyper-independent people. This fear, rooted in past experiences, may cause them to reject offered help, even when they are struggling. Clinical psychologist Amy Marschall, PsyD, notes that hyper-independent people may struggle to ask others for help when overwhelmed or unable to pass tasks on to someone else.
Despite these challenges, hyper-independent people's devotion and dedication to being a good friend are helping them move past their trust issues. They value action over good intentions, and having an independently motivated hard worker to help without requiring initiation is a significant gesture. Being part of a hyper-independent person's small group of friends is a sign that you have earned their trust.
Hyper-independent people are learning what it means to be in a healthy relationship with mutual support through their close friends. They are discovering the importance of asking for help and accepting it when offered. This journey towards vulnerability and trust is not easy, but it is a necessary step towards forming deeper, healthier relationships.
If you suspect that you or someone you know may be struggling with hyper-independence, resources are available. The articles '6 'Bone-Tiring' Signs You're Actually Too Independent', 'The Simple Clue Your Childhood Trauma Might Still Be Messing With You, According to a Psychologist', and '8 Subtle Traits Of People With Only A Few Friends' may provide insight and guidance.
Remember, asking for help is not a sign of weakness, but a sign of strength. It is a step towards building stronger, healthier relationships and a step towards a more balanced, fulfilling life.
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